God Provides...

I know that I should not be surprised at God's provision, but I stand in awe of what He is doing in our lives.  He is amazing.  I love sharing with everyone that He is taking care of us.  It was a great struggle for me to pull the trigger to stay at home.  Our income would be cut in half.  We would lose a lot of luxuries in life.  But - I would have my baby, and I would have my God, and I would have my friends... and on and on.  Just no tv.  I told my gramma about our plan for me to stay home and what changes that would mean for us as a family.  I told her that we were relying on God for the loose ends... we knew that He would come through for us.  She, of course, worried and worried.  I didn't know this until today when I told her the grand plans that God has in store for us.  She said that she was so concerned that we didn't have tv, that she was going to pay for it!!  I told her that things were so good now, that we could have tv if we wanted it.  I also told her that because I am going to be staying home with Jane, that we can stay longer on our visits to PA.  That made her very happy.  :-)

I have only seven working days left at NEW... like I have said before... it's bittersweet.  I really am going to miss that place.

love wins,
rk

where do I go from here?

It's a bittersweet time for me.  I am leaving the first job that I actually enjoy getting out of bed for.  I don't hate it there... I don't hate the people... I don't hate the work...I don't hate it at all.  But - now that Jane is in the picture, I do hate being away from her.  I hate not knowing what she is doing.  I wasn't there when she held her bottle for the first time.  I wasn't there when she started sitting in the "sassy" (one of those door-jumper things).  I don't want to miss any more of those little firsts....and I want to remember to take a million photos along the way. 

I have so many dreams for Jane.  I want her to serve.  I want her to love.  I want her to sleep through the night.  I cherish my sleep.  I know that most moms would love to have a baby that only gets up once, but really... I want to have a baby that gets up no times.  :-)

But really... how do I get where I want to go?  I have so many ideas floating around in this head of mine.  I don't know which of them are do-able.  I don't know which ones I have time for, and which ones I don't.  Here are some of my ideas:

• a book of letters to Jane from her mom (and sometimes dad!)  I want her to know what was going on while she was growing up... and I want this to be a special gift years from now...
• some sort of grocery business... shopping for people, couponing for people, teaching classes...
• or... another way to bring in a little income for us
• exercising
• blogging
• reading
• serving
• cooking (this has ALWAYS been my passion!)
• intentionally getting to know three echoers and living life with them

so, where do I go from here?  I do know, however, the answer is not too far away...I serve and love a God who is faithful and won't let me go too astray.

love wins,
rebecca

...and here we go!

Operation: Stay at home mom.  On Monday, January 4, I told my boss that I am going to stay at home with Jane.  What was I thinking???  This is going to cut our income basically in half.  I have grown accustomed to a comfortable lifestyle, complete with cable tv, and money for thing that I want.  Max has already cut off the cable, and I am still working!  What I am ever to do without The Biggest Loser?  And that's just one of the shows I am obsessed with!  That's not mentioning one of about 100 shows on the Food Network!  And Ellen?  Who am I going to get my crazy game ideas from? 

But ya know what?  It makes me realize a few things.  I don't have money to go to the movies, so I'll stay in, and spend quality time with the man I fell in love with.  We don't have the same grocery budget, so I am forced to cook from the pantry, instead of running out to get what I want.  We don't have cable, so I will read more... especially the Bible.  The TV thing I thought was going to be the hardest to live with - but I am already reading more... and reading to Jane.  The free time I have (wait... do stay at home moms have free time?!?) after Jane goes down is going to become my blogging time, my exercising time, my cutting coupon time, my me time.  My me and Jesus time.  My detox from the day time. 

It makes me realize that I don't need all this "stuff" to be happy.  I am joyful that I am able to stay at home with my baby.  I am able to use my time to get closer to the Lord, and in turn, raise Jane to love Jesus too.  I pray that she has the heart of a servant. 

So here we go... operation: stay at home mom.  I'll be working until at least the end of January... then it's home for this mama. 

Up next:  where do I go from here?

love wins,
rk